I never understood fully what being a single mom meant before I had my son. Everyone always talks of how hard it is to raise a child on your own. I did get that part. As a single mom I would have to do the work of two parents....on top of everything else I had to do. I am the sole income, the sole homemaker, the sole cleaner, cooker, tear drier, and heart mender. Everything for my son I had to do myself. This isn't saying my family didn't help. Or that his father doesn't either. Most days this is a life saver. Others....well lets just say my hair used to be a lot thicker.
The thing most people don't get about being a single parent is that with every down there is an up. For every tear your child sheds most likely there are so many more smiles. Jonny is that way. He has always been such a happy baby and child. The joy I felt the first time he smiled at me made everything I had gone through up until then worth every pain. Well let me start at the beginning of the story.
Though many will look down on me for it, Jonny's father and I weren't dating let a lone married. We had been friends but that was all. One night (and I will admit to there being alcohol involved) was all there was. A month later I found out I was pregnant. Pregnant? How was I supposed to raise a child? I was still living at home. I had just dropped out of college and even though I was working it was not really enough to support myself let alone both a child and me. To say I was depressed would have been an understatement. But being as stubborn as I am I knew I would only be able to live with one option. I would keep my child. No matter what happened.
I moved out of my house, even moved out of state to some place cheaper to live, cuz lets face it California is way over priced. Everything was going pretty well. Then one night I ended up curled up on the floor of the bathroom feeling as though my insides were tearing themselves apart. Of course my family all thought I was miscarrying. Luckily for me I just had gallstones. Unluckily, the doctors pussyfooted around until it was too late and I had to wait till after I had the baby to have my gallbladder removed. So I spent the next six months in the ER every other night.
Well everything else about the pregnancy and birth was pretty much normal. So was the first year of Jonny's life. We bonded well and like I said he was a happy baby. Slept through the night almost to the night I brought him home. It wasn't till after I ended up having to move back in with my parents that I started to have issues. ......
